Skateboarding Grandad Attempts Speed Record

Skate Record
Skate Record

In an attempt to keep up with not only the Jones’s, but also with the yoof of today, Mr Grant Fundamental, 103, Lindal’s oldest resident (except for his father) climbed aboard a skateboard and attempted to beat the Worlds Skateboard Speed Record. The record stood at 91.17 mph and was set by Peter Connelly of the UK.

His interest had been peaked by his Great, Great Grandson, Ronaldo Ranoldo after watching him try to perform a ‘triple round donkey push’ off the kitchen windsill. Grant, 106, told us “I watched him again and again and again try to perform this seldom attempted trick, and to his credit, he finally achieved it after the 973rd attempt. The poor lad hadn’t eaten for three days”

Grant had never even stood on a Skateboard up until that point, so he took it easy by propelling himself along using his Zimmer frame to stay upright. Over the following days, Grant had managed to successfully navigate going down a curb, and further to that, just shy of a week, he had managed to descend Ireleth Hill at just over 23 mph.

“I just got the bug. I understood what Ronaldo, 5, got out of it. The exhilaration on travelling on a plank of wood with wheels was just too much. It turned into an addiction. The more I skated, the more I wanted to skate.”

Mr Fundamental then began preparing for the ‘Big One’. This was a sponsored event in which those who wished to view the extravaganza could donate to a local charity and then present the receipt in exchange for a ticket.

The ten thousand strong crowd lined the route down Kirby moor; the atmosphere of anticipation was electric. From the break of dawn people gathered, bringing picnics and dogs and picnics for dogs. Finally, at just after three o clock, to a fanfare delivered by Kirby A Capella Group, Mr Fundamental pushed off.

The fastest of three times could be accepted as an official record. The first run brought in a speed of 15.32 mph. We were informed that “It’s just a test to make sure there were no new potholes.” A motorbike, provided by Hells Angels, returned Grant, 104, to the top of the hill and he began his last two runs.

Sadly the record breaking attempt did not meet the excitement which had built as the fastest time set was 16.98 mph.

The Barrow Evening Mail will not be covering any more World Record Attempts by Mr Fundamental.

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