Zombie Badgers Raid Barrow Bins

Zombie Badger
Zombie Badger

It has emerged that a spate of bins being tipped over was not the result of a band of unwieldy millennials, and if we hadn’t have given it away in the title it would have been a surprise, but a band of Zombie Badgers.

The first appearance of the phenomenon was reported by a Mrs Kermit Jones, 34, who on insisting that she had seen a Badger get hit by a car, and after dragging the corpse to the side of the road, watched on in horror when the Badger got up and tried to eat her toes. It was only by chance that the pensioner was going swimming and therefore had been wearing her steel toe capped boots, that the Badger did not pierce her skin; he did somehow steal a sock. Mrs Jones was forcefully admitted into psychiatric care, but since released.

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Return of Barrovian Boris the Battling Badger

Battling Badger
Boris gets released from local Police station

Barrow AFC have announced a statue of their pre war mascot has been commissioned by the management team. Fundraising has begun and the hope is that Barrow AFC can raise a total of £120,000 by Febuary 2015 to allow them to get a mould made. A further £347,000 will be needed by the end of June 2015 to cast the full sized bronze effigy.

If anyone out there remembers Barrovian Boris the Battling Badger they will have fond memories of watching the mascot pretend to beat up the opposition players. The riotous acts of Boris kept the crowds entertained before, during and after the game. It was reported that after one particular cup game, he performed for nearly thirty six hours. His silly walk and pretend trips had the locals and visiting fans rolling in the stands.

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